larussavrasmus

LaRussa V Rasmus: Tale of the Tape

Over the weekend, Cardinals manager Tony LaRussa admitted to the press that his favorite whipping boy, Colby Rasmus responded to a good tongue lashing by balling up in the corner and vowing to never stand up unless he was traded. Both ran to GM Johnny Mozeliak to tell their side of the story. And it was funny.

Until we remembered that both these people are millionaires. Then it was pretty pathetic.

So let’s go ahead a figure out who’s side we are on since there is no clear-cut Cardinal we should be rooting for. It’s time for…

THE TALE OF THE TAPE!

Colby Rasmus

PLUS: “Fire Burning In The Outfield

MINUS: That silly brim.

PLUS: Super sweet swing.

MINUS: That super ugly strikeout swing.

PLUS: Youth.

MINUS: Daddy issues.

Tony LaRussa

PLUS: Celebrity friends of the program.

MINUS: Buzz.

PLUS: 30+ years of managerial experience.

MINUS: 30+ years of completely unnecessary pitching changes.

PLUS: That mane. What a mane.

MINUS: That DUI video. For shame it wasn’t before YouTube.

THE WINNER?

Meh. By TKO.

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