It’s probably sacrilegious to give a Cardinal fan something with the Cubs’ logo on it…but this is Cardinal Crapmas we’re talking about. And well, this gift is…is something:
In honor of the Redbirds’ new #3, on the third day of Cardinal Crapmas, we present to you the 2010 Ryan Theriot bobblehead, in which he’s in fishing gear, on a boat (motherfucker!) sponsored by Juicy Fruit.
This was an actual giveaway at the actual Wrigley Field – not a Peoria Chiefs game, that would make too much sense – in June of this past season. Just like all the other sound decisions that Cubbie management is known for, they spent the money to have 10,000 of these made, then traded Theriot a month an a half later.
It’s really a fun gift no matter how you look at it:
1) It symbolizes Cubs Failure.
2) It’s the weirdest bobblehead of all time – ever.
3) It makes a great gift for those who love Brendan Ryan, because of the two reasons above.
4) Or if you didn’t care much for Brendan Ryan, but can’t figure out what Cardinal management is thinking this offseason, it symbolizes their 2011 march to third place mediocrity.
5) If you have a cat, they will probably freak out if you put this in front of them.
6) It would actually look funny sitting on the edge of your bathtub.
Despite the Cubs logo splotched all over this thing, we give it the thumbs up. Your Cardinal Crapmas list needs a versatile, scrappy gift, and this bobblehead works hard and gets the job done.
And you’ll probably be ripping off Theriot’s head by May 15th, so problem solved.