Happy Martin Luther King Jr. Day, everybody!
To celebrate this great holiday, producers of The Bachelor have put together a very special edition of the show, showcasing their commitment to diversity in this great nation of ours.
They haven't? I am shocked… SHOCKED!
Listen, this wasn't Juan Pablo's decision, after all. He's an erudite man. Cultured. There is no way that he would be party to such tacid discrimination.
He had to apologize this week for saying that having a gay Bachelor wouldn't be a "good example"?
Let's Date (before this gets any more uncomfortable)…
7:06 – There's no other way to put it. I want that car boat, and I want it now. Probably even more than the HotTug we saw a few seasons back. It's close, but car boat wins.
7:10 – Cassandra has a child with Detroit Piston Rodney Stuckey. If she doesn't win, what are the chances that she ends up on Basketball Wives? 100%? 105%?
7:19 – By the way, when she says "the last time I felt this way about a man was 3 years ago", Cassandra was 18 years old. Or a senior in high school. In case you didn't feel silly enough for watching this show.
7:31 – Sharleen – what a warrior. We thought Lone Survivor was intense, didn't we? WRONG. Get Mark Whalberg on the phone ASAP.
7:41 – Did they all change in the locker room?
7:42 – Vine without comment.
7:49 – So the lady who doesn't make out with Juan Pablo in a stadium concession stand or at midfield where everyone is watching gets the rose? Hmmm. Funny how all that works.
8:03 – Since you just spent 10 full minutes on the build up to a bungee jump, you can spend :90 more seconds watching this bungee prank. Friends.
8:13 – Billy Currington. Not better than Hugo. Bring back Hugo. He tore it up in that winter wonderland performance.
8:29 – Juan Pablo, sir, I salute you. So often that pool is neglected. But you? You pooh-pooed a cocktail party to use that pool. Well played. Then again, Juan Pablo doesn't drink.
8:42 – Renee won't win this season of The Bachelor. But she does deserve some sort of an award for being Juan Pablo's therapist on the inside. At this point, she might not even be a contestant, but a paid consigliere.
CUT – Christy, Lucy
NEXT WEEK – South Korea, finding the real deal, Juan Pablo hogging, bad mothering, hiding for only so only, mixed feelings.